How to Catch a Cold (A Tongue-in-Cheek Guide to Doing Everything Wrong)
It’s that time of year again—cold and flu season. No one actually wants to catch a cold, but sometimes it seems like people go out of their way to make it happen. So, with a little humor and a lot of truth, here’s a step-by-step guide to how to catch a cold—so you can recognize what not to do if you want to stay healthy.
Eat a Poor Diet
If your goal is to get sick, start with your food choices. Load up on processed foods that have been stripped of their nutritional value. Add plenty of sugar, refined carbohydrates, and junk food. A nutrient-poor diet weakens the immune system and makes it harder for your body to defend itself.
Avoid Adequate Rest
Sleep is overrated—at least if you want to catch a cold. Stay up late, cut your sleep short, and rely on caffeine, sugar, or other stimulants to push through the day. Chronic sleep deprivation stresses the nervous and immune systems and lowers your resistance to illness.
Stop Exercising
Your lymphatic system relies on movement to circulate immune cells throughout the body. Unlike your heart, it doesn’t have a pump. So if you want to reduce immune efficiency, stop exercising altogether. You’ll also miss out on the stress-reducing and mood-boosting benefits of regular movement.
Rarely Wash Your Hands
Personal hygiene really gets in the way of catching a cold. Skip handwashing whenever possible and be sure to touch your eyes, nose, and mouth frequently—especially after contact with shared surfaces.
Think Negative Thoughts
Believe it or not, mindset matters. Spend time focusing on news reports about illness, worry about getting sick, and pay close attention to advertisements for cold and flu remedies. Chronic stress and negative thinking can suppress immune function over time.
Invite Stress
Stress yourself physically by exposing your body to extreme temperature changes. Stress yourself mentally by worrying about things you can’t control. Complain often. Chronic stress places heavy demands on both the nervous and immune systems, leaving you more vulnerable to illness.
Become Dehydrated
Water supports nearly every function in the body, including immune defense. So if you want to get sick, avoid drinking enough fluids. Dehydration reduces the effectiveness of mucous membranes and other natural barriers that help protect you from infection.
Neglect Your Chiropractic Adjustment
Finally, ignore your nervous system—the master control system of the body. Spinal misalignments (subluxations) can interfere with nerve communication and affect how well the body adapts to stress and illness. Regular chiropractic adjustments support nervous system function and immune response, so skipping care may increase your chances of getting sick.
The Takeaway
Laughter may be the best medicine, but prevention still matters. If you don’t want to catch a cold this season, simply reverse the steps above: eat well, sleep consistently, move your body, manage stress, stay hydrated, and support your nervous system.
Regular chiropractic care is one way to help keep your body functioning at its best—especially during cold and flu season.
📞 If it’s been a while since your last adjustment, call the office to schedule an appointment.